Black Monday
Jack and Coke
Feria "Black Leather" (its for GUYS!)

Black pants, funky buttondown shirt (NOT tucked in), big plastic rings, lipstick.

New Year's Morning Mimosas
Fry It And They Will Come
Jack+Coke=Tom Waits, White Russians=Wayne Newton and Peggy Lee, Absinthe=Erik Satie, Cosmopolitans=Grenadine and Stereo Totale
Senior Year of College (seriously) dancing with Teresa Sesher to "Freebird" at the Exchange Students Going Away Party. PROPS TO ESKO KOPONEN!
Greeeeeeeeeeeeen
"The Marriage of Cadmus and Harmony" by some Italian guy. Also, anythng by that everlovin' poet James Tate. Personal to Joanne Beard: WRITE ANOTHER BOOK!
Tie: Harold and Maude and Puce Moment by Kenneth Anger
The Majestic Hornbeam
More kitties, please
Telemarketing for some computer company that would'nt teach me about the product I was selling but whose owners thought a "woman's voice--you know" would sell more...even if that voice had to say "Duh" all day...
Edith Piaf, Anais Nin, Joanne Beard, Hazel Pethig, Kate Millet, MY MOM
Yes. Because if you cut me open, and I'm not suggesting you do, that is the word you will find stamped on my spine.
LUPEC is Feministic Joie De Vivre

My bar will either be called "Elyria" or "The Red Velvet Swing" or "The Victor Rebeles." It will be poorly lit but with good cinematography. THERE WILL BE NO TELEVISIONS ANYWHERE, and none of those stupid little videogamepokergame things. Please, if you cant read or make small talk, I dont want your drinking money. The jukebox will be fabulous--retro yet cutting edge yet with a good dose of humor. There will be a small stage for good music and such. There will be barfood and obligatory bowls of really good NOT prepackaged snack mix. I will bartend and wear really dark lipstick everynight.

And there will always be toilet paper in the women's room.

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